Disgruntled employees? Click here
"Dylan, I don't know how much longer I can do this." I could feel the emotion in Tracy's voice. It was our first coaching call and everything was coming out. Tracy was a relatively new manager, she had been in her role about 3 years and had a decent amount of success with her whole team.
Except for one team member - Jack. Jack had wanted the team leader position that Tracy ended up getting, and seemed to resent that.
Now if we have team members who are overtly acting out, that's one thing right? We can have some tough conversations, hold them accountable if it continues and sooner or later, sort that problem out.
But what if our employee (Jack) wasn't exactly swearing and carrying on, but just being a bit passive aggressive? A bit abrasive in the way he talks. A bit dismissive of Tracy's ideas.
It can be super challenging to address more subtle (yet still destructive) behaviours. There's often not a clear behaviour we can point to, which makes the tough conversation, all that more tough.
Here are 3 strategies you can use to address passive aggressive behaviour or subtle undermining from a team member.
Let them know something seems off. If your employee is intentionally being passive aggressive, asking "are you okay today?" or "you seem a bit off" is a great way to subtly call them out on their behaviour. If they aren't aware of it - they may be bringing in personal issues to work, and this is a great way of starting that conversation as well.
Give them feedback, and the benefit of the doubt. "Hey I know you didn't mean to come across this way, but you actually came off a bit dismissive of other's ideas in that last team meeting." Giving them the benefit of assuming positive intent, makes the tough chat a bit less intimidating and reduces the level of evidence you need to have the conversation.
Take notes. If the above strategies don't work, you are eventually going to have an open conversation with them. Because this behaviour is difficult to quantify, the more evidence you have - the better.
Dealing with a disgruntled team member is never easy, but it's incredibly important to get onto it - before it tanks the culture in your team. Tracy did - using a combination of strategy 1 and 2 above, and now a month later Jack has a much better attitude.
